The Secret of Birthdays
by the homo club
Summary: Sherlock has been dead for three years, and John is feeling miserable on his birthday. I'm awful at summaries please just read it it's really good I promise. Total Johnlock fluffiness. Slight angst, but it passes in the first chapter so don't worry.
1. Alive

John dreaded waking up on his birthday. His birthday had taken place on week before Sherlock had killed himself.

John could remember his birthday clearly. Sherlock had only found out in the middle of the day, and made it a point to rush out and buy him something.

_Oh, and he made you a cake. _John remembered, thinking back before he unlocked the flat.

_Sherlock ordered John to stay out of the kitchen. "I'm doing an important experiment, John, and it's very dangerous. Do not come into the kitchen unless I tell you it's okay." Sherlock said, rushing into the kitchen._

_When Sherlock went out to collect information on a new case, John was given the 'okay' to go into the kitchen. After sitting around watching crap telly for a half-hour, John went to see what Sherlock had been fussing over for the past three or so hours._

_When he went into the kitchen, he was shocked to see a blue and white cake, curly writing in frosting reading:_

_Happy Birthday, John._

_ -SH_

John sighed sadly and opened the door to the flat.

Though he knew it would be, he was disappointed to see the flat was silent, dusty, and empty. John sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time that day and sat on the sofa where Sherlock usually sat. _Used _to sit.

John sat there, sad and alone on the third birthday that he had without his flatmate and best friend there.

After about and hour or so of brewing in his own sadness, John was startled by a bump in the kitchen. He got up to see what it was, and what he saw shocked him to no end.

On the counter sat a white and blue cake, and written in the curly, neat writing, read:

_Happy Birthday, John._

_Turn around._

_ -SH_

John stood there in shock for a moment or so, before he slowly turned around.

"Hello, John."

John wanted to punch the tall, lanky man in front of him, but he couldn't bring himself to.

"S..Sherlock..Is that r-really you..?" John asked in disbelief.

"Yes, of course it's me, John." Sherlock opened his long skinny arms for John to wrap himself in; John did just that.

Sherlock wrapped his arms around John's shoulders, resting his head on top of John's. John wrapped his arms around Sherlock's torso, gripping desperately at the back of his coat, his head resting in the crook of Sherlock's neck.

"Sherlock...Sher..Lock.." John whimpered into Sherlock's neck, tears rolling off of his face. Sherlock ran a soothing hand through John's hair.

"Shh, Shh...I know, and I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...to hurt you like this. I just needed to make sure that you were safe...Forgive me?"

John shuttered. All Sherlock wanted was to be forgiven, and John was willing to do that. Not completely, but he would do it.

"Y..Yes, I forgive you, Sherlock...Just-just never do it again...God, I was so alone.."

Sherlock pulled away from John. "I'm sorry. I...I...I love you. I know that I'm not good with emotions, and that I will probably mess this all up at some point, but..I believe that I love you."

John's heart sped up, missing several beats. John leaned in, kissing Sherlock lightly on the lips.

When Sherlock hadn't kissed back, John was nervous, but he figured he'd give him a bit longer.

And that short amount of time was enough. Sherlock ran his hand through John's soft hair, kissing him back lightly.

When they pulled back, John smiled and tilted his head so their foreheads were resting against each other. "I believe that I love you too, Sherlock."

* * *

**A/N: hey hey hey ill go more in the morning if you want okay bye**

**ps: this was inspired by hikaruhan's "After the fall" on deviantart**


	2. The Kiss When The Clock Struck Three

John and Sherlock settled down on the couch, John feeling too tiered to ask Sherlock how he had gotten there, how he was still alive.

And so, John rested on the couch with his head laying in Sherlock's lap, happy out of his mind. Still, they hadn't really discussed the kiss. Sherlock had told John that he was in love with him, and John had said the same.

_That was idiotic, I'm not even gay! ..But, Sherlock is rather attractive, for a man, at least. His prominent cheek bones, his lanky arms, his curly baby-soft hair, his eerily blue eyes. . ._

John quickly pushed all thought of Sherlock out of his mind. Or, at least, he tried to. He wondered more about his confession, and he wasn't sure what to think.

_Okay, let me think. . .He said that he wasn't good with emotions, which is true, but knowing Sherlock, he would have done research on what love feels like. Sherlock never takes a shot in the dark. _

_And another thing - When I had kissed Sherlock, and it took him a moment to respond, I was nervous._

_Nervous of what?_

_Of him not kissing me._

_Why?_

_Because._

_When I told him that I believe that I'm in love with him, I wasn't exactly lying to him._

_I just need to run some tests._

And with those thoughts, John fell asleep, his head resting in Sherlock's lap and the telly playing some crime show.

And he was, for the first time in three years, truly happy.

* * *

Sherlock sat on the couch for about an hour or so, before he figured John was asleep. He watched his sleeping form, his hair brushing across his forehead. He swooped a hand down to his forehead, his long fingers brushing against his skin as he pushed soft hair out of his face.

John shifted in his sleep, though he did not wake. Sherlock glanced at the clock.

3:00 AM.

He sighed and stood up, carefully pulling John out of his lap to prevent his awakening. Sherlock glanced around, soon finding a blanket on the back of the sofa. He pulled it around John, pulling the blanket up to his shoulders. He took yet another glance and John's sleeping form.

John looked much younger while he slept, Sherlock noted. He brushed a hand against his cheek and turned to leave to his room for the night.

Sherlock stopped in his tracks when he felt a hand on his wrist.

"..Don't leave."

He turned back to see John grabbing his wrist, a sleepy look in his eyes.

"I don't want to wake up without you here again."

John's voice was small, almost shy.

_What does he mean by that? Does he just mean that he doesn't want me to disappear by the time he wakes up?_

Sherlock gave the matter no more thought and simply climbed onto the couch next to John.

"Then you won't have to." Sherlock kissed John lightly on the lips.

It felt right. The kiss was warm and soft, and only the second Sherlock had ever gotten.

The first kiss being taken by John earlier that day.

John kissed back without much hesitation. The kiss was light, their lips only barely touching. But it didn't stay that way for long.

John pressed his lips more firmly against Sherlock's, wanting to deepen the kiss. Seeing that, Sherlock shyly licked the bottom of John's lip, asking to be let in.

John complied and parted his lips slightly, letting Sherlock's tongue slip into his mouth. The kiss lasted for more then five minutes, but it stayed at the comfortable, slow-ish pace.

Sherlock slowly pulled away from John, though their lips still ghosted over each others.

Instead of kissing John again, Sherlock relished in the feeling of John's breath against his skin, as it was something he had wished to feel for more then three years.

"...John, do you really feel the same as I do about you, or were you just returning the favor?" Sherlock asked. That was probably the only time that Sherlock had truthfully sounded shy, Sherlock mused.

John couldn't help but let out a breathy chuckle.

"Sherlock, I just kissed you while laying on the couch at three in the morning for at least five minutes, do you think I could have faked that?"

John asked, smiling softly at Sherlock.

Sherlock looked at John, dumbfounded. He really _had_ just kissed him. _He properly kissed me, with tongue and all of that, _Sherlock mused.

Then, Sherlock smiled the smallest of smiles. "No. You're not that good of an actor." John smiled and kissed Sherlock's nose, chuckling.

"Go to sleep, you've got some explaining to do in the morning."


End file.
